Winning Pan Am's is like winning the lottery.

So I won Pan Am's.  I know that does not make me any better then I was two weeks ago.  In fact I won on a Referee Decision so if the Referee had a cramp in his left arm and lifted his right arm instead the other guy would have won.

I did not win in dominating fashion.  Just got by and got the win in my matches.  The surprising thing is how many people think this makes me a better Jiujitsu Player then I was two weeks ago.  I have a lot of friends on Facebook and a good number of them are involved in BJJ so I got a lot of pats on the back and congratulatory remarks after my win.  I had a couple of good Photo Ops with some well known JiuJitsu Stars like Xande Ribeiro.  So I didn't even say anything when I went to train and I got a lot of accolades when I showed up because it seemed everyone knew I had won.

I have sparred at my regular places since then and two other places while I was travelling. (so 4 different places)  It seemed like when I showed up I was now the new target to be beat on.  I remember how much harder people went with me when I became a Blue Belt and the same thing is happening now.  I am getting my butt kicked almost every single roll.  I am not sure I needed to be humbled but it is sure happening.  It seems a memo must have went out saying that this guy is a Pan Am Champion so beat on him.  I have not sparred with a White Belt since then.  I have sparred with young, athletic blue belts and higher belts.  These guys could have easily worked me over before but now that they are going harder they are really working me over.  I mean I am getting Bicep Sliced, Calf Sliced, Wrist Locked, Arm Barred in ways I never knew existed and Choked from places I never knew you could choke from.

I wonder how long it is going to take these guys to realize I am still the same old guy (emphasis on old) and that they could and can always work me over if they go hard.  I like to keep it playful and work on technique  so hopefully the guys rolling with me will get back in that mode so we both can progress.  Until then I will continue to take my lumps and I will remember the advice of a friend who won the lottery who told me "if you win the lottery don't tell anyone or they will start to change the way they act toward you" I now know if I win a big Tournament again it might be best to keep it to myself so I don't have to get beat down like I am right now.

Sits around all day, then sleeps at tournaments.

What a great experience.  I am always amazed at how the Jiujitsu and other martial art communities really accept each other.  I met a guy there who was in a wheelchair.  He was about 35 years old and was a disabled Vet.  He had no use of his legs but he was out their competing with able bodied competitors.  

An important part of BJJ is being able to hold your opponent with your legs.  If you have no use of your legs it eliminates this component for you.  That means that people will easily pass your guard and can easily choke you.  No off course he is used to this and because of his lack of legs strength he has far superior grip and also is a master of wrist locks if you are haphazard, taking it easy or overlooking this opponent you will be tapping to a wrist lock before you know it and the match will be over.  He got Choked out in one of his matches and I talked to him afterwards and asked him if he was okay.  He told me he was and that he never taps he would rather just pass out.  I thought the guy was probably pretty good at dealing with pain and if that is what he wanted then okay.  Then I saw he just posted this picture on his Instagram and I thought it was funny.  

BTW his name is Brian Freeman and he did get a 3rd place finish at Pans so major props to him.  It was an 8 man bracket  

Pan Ams are over and I have to say the cutting weight was worth it.  All those posts I wrote about cutting weight being silly and not worth it were wrong. (in my case anyway)  When you get to compete with guys who are a little bit smaller then you instead of a little bit bigger then you it makes a world of difference.  (I know this is not brain surgery but I really did not know how significant the weight factor was until I competed at the  lower weight).

My normal weight is in the low 170s and with Gi about 175-178.  I have always competed at Middle Weight as a white belt and did fairly well but every once in a while I went against a beast who no matter how hard I tried, my technique could not overcome their physical strength.  I was promoted to Blue Belt in December so I decided I should drop to light weight for Pans so I would not have to face guys both technically better and stronger then  me.  I made the weight drop and now I was the beast in the weight class.

I have to say it was very enjoyable and even after the matches I did not feel the same amount of strain on my body that I felt as a middle weight.

One funny thing happened my instructor did not have his credentials in order so could not get on the floor for my first match so his instructor Xande Ribeiro stepped in to Coach me.  Pretty good substitute if you ask me.  If the final I had Saulo, Xande, Fabrio, and my instructor (Sean) all on the mat side coaching me.  Plus I had Dan Lukeheart giving me some instruction also.  It was an anti Climatic Final going to referee decision but I wonder if having all those big names in my corner helped me when it came time for the decision to be made.

I met a ton of friend that I knew from Facebook and Instagram and I have to say the BJJ community is really one group of good guys that really seem to enjoy being around each other.

The journey continues.  I really like this Picture of Xande and I after my first match.

Pan Ams are this week good luck to all competitors

Okay I was driving into the office today and there is this one place  where I have to drive across a two lane road to get on the freeway.  There is a lot of traffic at this spot and sometimes the back up to cross can be several cars deep.  When an opening comes you make a dash and sometimes 2-3 cars can get through before the traffic starts up again.  There is a stop light about a half a mile up the road and that is what causes the space.  So as I was waiting my turn to dash I noticed that when a car was turning that the car coming the opposite direction would speed up.  

My question is what is the purpose of speeding up?  Do you want to T bone the car crossing the road? Why would you want to be in an accident?  What would happen if the car crossing the road stalls or it is an inexperienced driver and they panic when they see you speed up.  Why do people do this?

Any way just something that frustrates me.  I am ready for Pans this week.  Got a good look at the Bracket and am ready to compete.  What drives a 53 year old to compete and how long will it drive me is still a question I ask but I am ready for this week.  

My father said if you get beat will you quit?  I think the answer is it would hard to get beat and then quit.  I think it is easier to quit when you win and think you have accomplished what you set out to accomplish.  If you get beat then you know you have things to work on and  that just drives you harder to get better for the next time you compete.  

We have heard many people say you learn more in defeat then in victory and it is true in BJJ.  Sure it is more fun to win but you rarely go back and analyze you mistakes when you win.  You get the false sense that the move you did or the technique you tried will always work because it worked on that one guy in that one situation.  In reality until you get your set ups perfected most of the time you just end up getting lucky to get in a spot that you know what to do in.  If you lose it gives you something very concrete to work on.  Of course, learning aside I will still prefer to win.

What do you really want out of BJJ?

I have been thinking about this for a while.  If you have been readying my blog you will know that I am 53 years old.  I hurt almost everyday that I do BJJ but I continue on.  Sometimes I ask myself why.  (Every day my wife asks me why.)  I have been thinking a lot about it.  At first I just chocked it up to a mid life crisis.  Trying to regain my youth but that was two years ago.  I am far to dedicated to BJJ at this point to think it was only a phase I was going through to satisfy some mid like crisis.  There are far more things that are easier to do that could fulfill that urge.  I could buy a Harley or a Corvette and take it out on weekends to satisfy the mid life crisis problems that occur.

I may have started because my son in law was interested and told me he was going to get our grandkids into it and I wanted to understand what this BJJ was all about but it is something much deeper now.  I really enjoy it.  I enjoy the sense of team I feel when I show up at the gym and I am greeted by my fellow grapplers.  (most of them are half my age)  These are guys I don't have a lot in common with.  They would be peers of my kids.  Why do I enjoy being around them?  I think it comes down to genuine respect.  I know it sounds silly but having these guys respect means a lot to me.  wfor me.  Some have respect just because I am showing up.  They know how difficult it is.  Other have respect because of my skills on a sweep or some other technical aspect of the sport.  It is strange but I really crave this positive feedback.  I am embarrassed that I need this positive reinforcement.  I mean I am 53 years old and you would think that I would be past the age where I needed someone to pat me on the back but I still need it.

I can tell you at my age I don't know if I will ever get to be a black belt.  I mean I would probably be around 65 by the time I had enough skills to be considered a legit black belt.  Also the Belt Promotion is not really a motivator for me.  They come so infrequent that I think if that was my motivation I would already be done.  I know I am most likely 4 years away from a Purple Belt.  If my motivation was self defense I would have quit.  (maybe bought a gun).   I don't go to places there are fights.  I am at Church every Sunday and usually in bed by 10 at night.  Not a lot of fights starting in the places I frequent. I have already lost 60 lbs.  Going from 220 to 160. I think I could easily maintain without the wear and tear on my body that I put it through each workout.   I think the thing that will keep me going is the respect from my fellow Jiujiteros.  As childish as it seems a compliment here or there will keep me coming back.

What is your motivation?  What keeps you going?  I think it is different for every person and I think it may change along this journey we know as BJJ.

So I entered Pan Jiu-Jitsu as a light weight 53 year old Blue Belt.

2 years ago when I started BJJ I weighed 220 lbs,, Did not know one Jiu Jitsu move. I had never even heard of Pans and I still call it Pan Ams after a big swim meet Sponsored by USA Swimming.

I am now a Blue Belt under 170 lbs who has been taught 1000's of moves and remembers at least 20 of them.  I am cutting a little weight just to be safe but am excited about my opportunity to test the skills I have learned against others who have the same desires.

Win or lose I am looking forward to this experience.

I train at two different locations,  One close to my office and one near my home so I can get in as much mat time as possible.  My home and office are only about 5  miles apart.

So I stopped by my local grocery store today to pick up some stuff for my wife and I saw a Martial Arts place popped up.  So I walked over there to see what was going on and it was a Gracie Academy BJJ place.  This is seriously less then a 1/4 of mile from where I train near my house and I would guess that with in 5 miles of this place there are at least 8 other BJJ Places.

My question is.  Will BJJ reach the point of Saturation?  Is it the current flavor of the month?  I don't mind all these places. I think the competition is good for the sport and each place does have a little different concentration or "Vibe" as the instructors like to say.  It give us more choices but it also makes it harder for the guys who want to run them full time to make descent living because the enrollment is spread out.

So what do you think?  Is so many BJJ Academies good for the sport?