I am a 53 year old middle weight. I dropped almost 40 lbs to get to middle weight so my Jiu Jitsu game is more like an old man heavy weight. Slow and methodical, not a lot of explosion and lots of resting between moves.
I usually attend the 11-12:30 class. For some reason this class is full of higher belts and heavier practitioners. Most of the guys are Purple Belts and above and most are over 200 lbs. I spar with all of them. I have noticed that some seem to be more confident in letting me try my stuff. They let me work on things and I feel when I spar with them my game improves. Others just want to smash me and impose their will on me. Some in a more aggressive way then others. With them I learn how to defend and spend a lot of time thinking if I should just tap because I have this bigger, younger, more experienced sparring partner just smashing me and I am having troubles breathing or I feel like my internal organs are getting moved in to areas of my body that were meant to be moved to.
It is almost impossible for me to recover guard when one of these big guys gets me in a tight side control shoulder against my head twisting my neck in an uncomfortable way.
Here is what I think is going on.
The guys who let me work my moves and don't worry too much about giving up an advantageous position have a lot of confidence in their abilities and don't really have that big of an ego. I have tapped out black belts, and brown belts (never a purple belt for some reason) when I am able to work a move and get it in really tight.
The guys who don't let me work any moves and just smash me or are very aggressive with me I think don't have the same confidence to escape a bad position or have ego's that won't allow them to tap if I get something on them that just happens to be so tight they cannot get out of. They think they are doing me a favor by smashing me because I would not appreciate or grow at the same rate if I they gave me position instead of earning it.
Let me tell you. I know you guys are better then me. If I tap you I know it is because you gave up a position to me. I in no way think I am your equal in skill if happen to get a sweep or mount on you. Lastly I really do appreciate you taking your time to spar with an older guy and giving me a few breaks a long with some pointers on mistakes I make. That is how I feel I learn best not getting smashed. What do you guys think?
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